It’s a joyous GOOMF as Doc and Kenny revel in the pain of the NCAA Tournament’s losers, the idiotic Redskins, and the ailing Jeremy Lin. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like The Onion on Facebook: www.fb.com Follow The Onion on Twitter: www.twitter.com
Related posts:
- Teen’s Death Hits Reporter Hard When a community loses a teen in a drunk driving accident, it’s Onion News Network reporter O’Brady Shaw who is most emotionally devastated. (Aired 10/11/11) Subscribe to The Onion on......
- Police: Kidnapped MoveOn.org Staffer’s “Please Help” Emails Went Completely Ignored Police: Kidnapped MoveOn.org Staffer’s “Please Help” Emails Went Completely Ignored Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like The Onion on Facebook: www.fb.com Follow The Onion on Twitter: www.twitter.com...
- Boy Loses Leg In Totally Awesome Shark Attack On Today Now!, Jim and Tracy talk to an 11-year-old who had his leg gnawed off by a cool-as-hell shark. (Aired 10/4/11) Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like......
- Could The Use Of Flying Death Robots Be Hurting America’s Reputation Worldwide? The First Responders debate the US military’s use of drone planes to rain fiery death upon Afghanistan from above. (Aired 10/11/11) Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like The......
- Romney’s Super Tuesday Polls Surge After He Begins Flaunting His Wealth Instead of downplaying his millionaire status, Mitt Romney is now wearing fur coats and gold chains. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like The Onion on Facebook: www.fb.com Follow......
- Joad Cressbeckler: Immigrants Who Survive Arizona Desert Deserve Citizenship On The Cressbeckler Stance, Joad says any Mexican who crosses the scorching-hot desert on foot has proved himself worthy of US citizenship. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like......
- Woman Sets Record For Longest Amount Of Time Spent Talking About Oneself Today Now! welcomes Linda Johnston, the inspiring woman who made history by talking about herself continuously for over fifty hours. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like The Onion......
- Obama Begs Voters Not To Make His Daughters Switch Schools The Obama campaign unveils a new strategy: urging Americans to keep him in the White House so Sasha and Malia don’t have to make new friends. (Aired 11/18/11) Subscribe to......
- Leaf From “Tree Of Life” Frontrunner For Best Actor Oscar On Star Fix, entertainment insiders say this might be the year Hollywood’s favorite leaf, which has appeared in more than 60 films, finally takes home the Academy Award. Subscribe to......
- Heartbroken Santorum Condemns Gay Marriage For Two-Timing Jerks Like Nick An emotional Rick Santorum stepped up his anti-gay rhetoric this week, saying jerks like Philadelphia’s Nicholas Wiseman should not be allowed to marry a man they barely know when there’s......
- Black Conservatives Support Candidate Whose Religion Believes Black People Bear Mark Of Cain The nation’s gross doctors recommend drinking eight cups of clam juice per day, a snake gets a tattoo of a dude on its face, and the Supreme Court overturns Right......
- Minnesota Braces For Return Of Bachmann’s Full Attention A fight kind of runs out of steam 15 seconds in, George Washington laments that his vision of the future has not been realized, and Philip Morris releases its new......
- World’s Youngest Person Born Meth addicts demand the government address the nation’s growing spider menace, KY introduces a new line of jam, and Prince Fielder reports to spring training exactly the right amount overweight.......
- Embarrassing Bounced Check From Greece Taped Up In IMF Headquarters The Vatican dispatches an elite team of bishops to sabotage contraceptive manufacturer Pfizer, an embarassing bounced check from Greece is taped up in the IMF headquarters, and Chris Kattan wonders......
- NewsBlitz: Senate Session Interrupted By Wailing Of Ted Kennedy’s Ghost Ted Kennedy’s crying ghost disrupts Congress and a pilot crashes in the Kardashian wilderness, in today’s NewsBlitz. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: bit.ly Like The Onion on Facebook: www.fb.com......
- Facebook To Allow Changes To Privacy Settings If Users Guess Word In Locket Worn By Mark Zuckerberg Female friends spend a raucous night validating the living shit out of each other, an exhausted sweatshop worker just has to laugh after sewing her fingers together, and a 5-year......
- Sale Of BET To White Supremacist Group Results In No Changes To Programming An alien world agrees to help Syria since this world refuses to, the sale of BET to a white supremacist group results in no changes to programming, and a little......
- Future: News From The Year 2137 – Now Available Purchase Now from iTunes: onion.com While other media outlets bring you news as it happens, only the Onion News Network has the power to bring you the news before it......
- Tim Tebow Becomes First Christian To Play In NFL – Sports Year in Review Kenny and Doc look down the barrel of a gun as they discuss the top stories of 2011, including Tim Tebow, LeBron James, and that unspeakable college football thing....
- Daily Life of a Basketballer Please end the NBA LOCKOUT already! The daily life of LeBryant Jordanicus Walton. Featuring Jeremy Lin of the Golden State Warriors. Jeremy Lin www.youtube.com JR Aquino www.youtube.com...
